12 Lies To Stop Telling Yourself

Today’s Inspiration: Marcandangel.com

“This title caught my eye and I found this article very eye opening and interesting. We talk to ourselves all the time, but what do we tell ourselves? And who says that this is true?”
~Sophie

Lying to others is wrong, but lying to
yourself is an absolute tragedy.

12 Lies To Stop Telling Yourself

The worst lies are the ones we subconsciously tell ourselves.  They’ve been ingrained in our minds by bad external influences and negative thinking.  So the next time you decide to unclutter your life and clean up your space, start with your intellectual space by clearing out the old lies and negative self-talk you often recite to yourself.

Here are twelve such lies to stop telling yourself:

1. I don’t have enough yet to be happy. – In every mistake and struggle there is a message.  Some people miss the message because they’re too busy berating themselves for the mistake, or fretting over the problem.  To be upset about what you don’t have is always a waste of what you do have.  The happiest of people aren’t the luckiest, and they usually don’t have the best of everything; they just make the most of everything that comes their way.  The reason so many people give up is because they tend to look at what’s missing, and how far they still have to go, instead of what’s present, and how far they have come.  Read The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People.
   
2. My dreams are impossible. – Don’t let someone who gave up on their dreams talk you out of going after yours.  The best thing you can do in life is follow your heart.  Take risks.  Don’t just make the safe and easy choices because you’re afraid of what might happen.  If you do, nothing will ever happen.  If you keep doing what you’re doing, you’ll keep getting what you’re getting.  Let your dreams be bigger than your fears and your actions speak louder than your words.  Do something every day that your future self will thank you for.
3. I am stuck with people who hurt me. – Life is too short.  Look out for yourself.  If someone continuously mistreats you, have enough respect for yourself to leave them.  It may hurt for a while, but it’ll be OK.  You’ll be OK.  Oftentimes walking away has nothing to do with weakness, and everything to do with strength.  We walk away not because we want others to realize our worth, but because we finally realize our own worth.
4. My failed relationships were a waste of time. – There are certain people who aren’t meant to fit into your life.  But no relationship is ever awaste of time.  If it doesn’t bring you what you want, it teaches you what you DON’T want.  We rarely lose friends, we just gradually figure out who our real ones are.  Never force someone to make a space in their life for you, because if they know your worth, they will surely create one for you.  And remember, when you’re up, your ‘friends’ know who you are, when you’re down, you know who your ‘real friends’ are.  It just takes a little time to figure it all out.
5. Things will never get better. – There is no person in the world capable of flawlessly handling every punch thrown at them.  That’s not how we’re made.  In fact, we’re made to get upset, sad, hurt, stumble and fall.  Because that’s part of living – to face problems, learn, adapt, and solve them over the course of time.  This is what ultimately molds us into the person we become.  When you find yourself cocooned in isolation and cannot find your way out of the darkness, remember that this is similar to the place where caterpillars go to grow their wings.  Just because today is a terrible day doesn’t mean tomorrow won’t be the best day of your life.  You just got to get there.  Read Emotional Freedom.
   
6. Failure is bad. – Sometimes you have to fail a thousand times to succeed.  No matter how many mistakes you make or how slow you progress, you are still way ahead of everyone who isn’t trying.  Don’t get so hung up on one failed attempt that you miss the opening for many more.  All of your ideas that don’t work are simply stepping stones on your way to the one idea that does.   And remember, failure is not falling down; failure is staying down when you have the choice to get back up.  Always get back up!  Oftentimes good things fall apart so better things can fall together.
7. Great things will come to me effortlessly. – We are who we choose to be.  Nobody’s going to come and save you, you’ve got to save yourself.  Nobody’s going to give you anything, you’ve got to go out and earn it.  Nobody knows what you want except for you.  And nobody will be as sorry as you if you don’t achieve it.  Never leave your key to happiness in someone else’s pocket, and don’t wait on someone else to build your dream life for you.  Be the architect and keeper of your own happiness.  The more you take responsibility for your past and present, the more you are able tocreate the future you seek.
8. My past is 100% indicative of my future. – At some point, we’ve all made mistakes, been walked on, used and forgotten.  We’ve let people take advantage of us, and we’ve accepted way less than we deserve.  But we shouldn’t regret one moment of it, because in those moments we’ve learned a lot from our bad choices.  We’ve learned who we can trust and who we can’t.  We’ve learned the meaning of friendship.  We’ve learned how to tell when people are lying and when they’re sincere.  We’ve learned how to be ourselves, and appreciate the truly great people and things in our lives as they arrive.  And even though there are some things we can never recover and people who will never be sorry, we now know better for next time.
9. I never need to meet anyone new. – It sounds harsh, but you cannot keep every friend you’ve ever made.  People and priorities change.  As some relationships fade others will grow.  Appreciate the possibility of new relationships as you naturally let go of old ones that no longer work.  Trust your judgment.  Embrace new relationships, knowing that you are entering into unfamiliar territory.  Be ready to learn, be ready for a challenge, and be ready to meet someone that might just change your life forever.
10. I can’t live without those who are gone. – If someone comes into your life and has a positive impact on you, but for some reason they can’t stay, don’t mourn for too long.  Be thankful that your paths crossed and that they somehow made you happy, even if it was just for a short while.  Life is change.  People really do come and go.  Some come back, some don’t, and that’s okay.  And just because one person leaves, doesn’t mean you should forget about everyone else who’s still standing by your side.  Continue to appreciate what you have, and smile about the memories.
11. I’m not ready because I’m not good enough yet. – Nobody ever feels 100% ready when an opportunity arises.  Because most great opportunities in life force us to grow beyond our comfort zones, which means we won’t feel totally comfortable at first.  Stop berating yourself for being a work in progress.  Start embracing it!  Because being a work in progress doesn’t mean you’re not good enough today; it means you want a better tomorrow, and you wish to love yourself completely, so you can live your life fully.  It means you’re determined to heal your heart, expand your mind and cultivate the gifts you know you’re meant to share.  You are ready.  You just need to start.  Read The Power of Now.
    
12. ….

Read this and more inspirational articles here

Read Full Post »

Happy Spring! About De-cluttering & Letting go

Happy Spring Equinox!

I love spring because it’s bright & optimistic, & everything smells fresh. This friday I will be going to Amsterdam (my hometown) for a week, I’m so excited!! This time of the year always inspires me to de-clutter, get organized and clean up. Below you find some inspiring words from galadarling.com (love her blog btw!) and she inspired me even more to get into the spring de-clutter mood.

Letting Go

The process of clearing clutter is all about letting go. Not just letting go of your belongings — that is only the end result. The most important thing is learning to let go of the fear that keeps you holding on to them after it is time to move them on their way.

I live half of each year in Bali, Indonesia, & half of each year in the West. I have been doing this for the last eight years, ever since I decided to do it. Sometimes people tell me they wish their lives could be like mine. They imagine that I have pots of money & can do whatever I want, but the truth is I started with nothing except an insatiable desire to live in Bali for six months of each year. When they look honestly at their own lives & see what prevents them from doing something they say they really want to do, a lot of it is attachment to possessions. They have set their lives up so that they are not free to do what they really yearn to do.

Just passing through

Life is constant change. So when something comes into your life enjoy it, use it well, & when it is time, let it go. It is that simple. Just because you own something, it doesn’t mean that you have to keep it forever. You are just a temporary custodian of many things as they pass through your life. You can’t, after all, take the contents of your kitchen cupboards with you when you die, & nor would you want to!

Everything material is merely energy in transition. You may think you own a house or have money in the bank, but the fact is you don’t even own the body you stand up in. It is on loan from the planet &, after you are done with it, it will be automatically recycled & reappear in a different form without you. You are spirit — glorious, eternal, indestructible spirit — but your human circumstance is what can best be described as a transient, “rent-a-body” situation.

Your body is the temporary temple of your soul. What you keep around you in the extended temple of your home needs to change with you as you change & grow, so that it reflects who you are. Particularly if you are engaged in any kind of self-improvement work, you will need to update your environment regularly. So get into the habit of leaving a trail of discarded clutter in your wake, & start to think of it as a sign of your progression!

Let go of fear

People hold on to their clutter because they are afraid to let it go — afraid of the emotions they may experience in the process of sorting through the stuff, afraid they will make a mistake & later regret getting rid of something, afraid they will leave themselves vulnerable, exposed or at risk in some way. Clutter clearing can bring up a lot of “stuff” to be faced & dealt with, & intuitively everybody knows it.

However, the rewards for clutter clearing are well worth it. Love & fear cannot exist in the same space, so everything you are holding on to through fear is blocking you from having more love in your life; clearing it allows more love to start pouring in. Fear stops you from being who you truly are & doing what you came here to do; clutter clearing brings you greater clarity about your life purpose. Fear suppresses your vital life force energy; releasing clutter helps reconnect you to your own natural vitality. Letting go of clutter leaves you free to be you, which is the greatest gift you can ever give yourself.

– by Galadarling.com 

I hope you feel inspired this by this post. Let’s get ready for spring and have a clean-up! Here are some ideas:

♥ Do a detox and drink many veggie juices and smoothies.

♥ Throw away any excess stuff you don’t need.

♥ Organize your closet, give away any clothes you don’t wear anymore.

♥ Clean up your computer, make everything nice and organized. Clean up your inbox and you itunes library.

♥ Clean the house!

P.S. If you liked the cherry blossom image at the top of this post, here’s a wallpaper-sized version!

Read Full Post »

Lets Start the Week With a Boost of Self Love

Hey there other side 🙂 ♥

Hope you are having a great start of a new week. To make it an even better one.. try this:

Read Full Post »

Healthy Easter Snack: Coconut Cookie Chicks!

Baby Chick Macaroons

I found these super cute easter treats at one of my favorite recipe blogs: chocolatecoveredkatie.com. Aren’t they adorable? And a nice bonus is that they are actually good for you!

These are the ingredients:

(Makes 12-14)

• 1 cup shredded, unsweetened coconut (see below for a lower-calorie version)
• 1 tbsp whatever flour you wish (such as ww pastry or even coconut flour)
• 1/2 cup plus 2 tbsp lite canned coconut milk (or regular canned)
• 3 tbsp agave or pure maple syrup
• 1 packet stevia (or 1 more tbsp agave, and cut back on liquid)
• 1/4 tsp pure vanilla extract
• tiny bit over 1/16 tsp salt

To know how exactly to make these, go to Katie’s blog and find out!

Read Full Post »

Self Acceptance Means Self Forgiveness

♥  Please share if you like this  ♥

Read Full Post »

Love who you are!

I hope you share if you like it 🙂

Read Full Post »

5 Ways Mindfulness Changed My Life

Today’s Inspiration: Creativespiritualwoman.com

“Mindfulness can be sooo powerful! That’s why I love this article so much. I think many of us have heard about it and this article gives you lots of inspiration and ideas on how to get more mindful in your life.”
~Sophie

5 Ways Mindfulness Changed My Life

It’s incredible to me how mindfulness has changed my life.

When we understand on a very real level that everything we focus on we are bringing into our lives, we begin to see that there are fewer and fewer things that really deserve that kind of power.

This is incredibly liberating and powerfully creative. As a result of the laser-like focus of mindfulness, I’ve learned the following life-altering things:

1. What is not in front of me now doesn’t really matter. 

So, so much of my old life was spent thinking about what might happen or what had already happened. I analyzed situations and motives until I couldn’t even remember what had really happened. I spent hours predicting what might happen, what someone might say, what the situation might be like and then developed resentments when reality was completely different. Becoming present has made it incredibly clear to me that this moment is the one I can act in. This moment is the one I can step into fully, make eye contact with others, and feel myself in my skin. No amount of recapping history or imagining an upcoming event can substitute for what I have now.

2. Asking myself, “what do I love now?” over and over again has made it powerfully clear to me what I want in life.

I used to get so frustrated, wondering if I was doing the right thing or wondering if I should be in a different field. I would get derailed easily when someone else would be passionate about what they were doing, wondering if I should do that, too. It was all lack of presence. Now that I have the experience of asking myself, over and over, what I really want, I am not at all swayed by what anyone else is doing. I know that at any given moment, I know what I want in life, because I’ve spent time honestly asking myself and listening to the answer.

It’s also a joy now to hear about new things that others are doing, and to be excited for them. I used to be frustrated when I heard about a new technology or new fun thing that someone was learning – I felt like I “should” be learning it too, and it felt heavy and oppressive. Now I love hearing about their passions and can be genuinely happy for their interests and accomplishments.

3. Knowing what I want has made it easier to eliminate what I don’t want.

There are so many amazing things in the world! It can be hard to choose from at first, when there are mountains to climb and people to meet and businesses to start and ideas to bring to life. There are an infinite number of amazing things to do and learn and love! I used to beat myself up for all the amazing things I wasn’t doing, and now I know that this isn’t possible, practical, or desirable.

In asking myself, over and over, in so many beautifully present moments, “What do I love now? What do I want to do now?” I have not answered with, “Write a novel,” “climb Kilimanjaro,” “go skydiving,” or “cure cancer.” Many other beautiful, perfect souls have these things on their lists. Maybe someday they’ll show up on mine – but not today! Today, my loves are: walking, eating amazing food (I’m pregnant, so food is powerfully important to me now), writing anything that helps someone else suffer less, collaborating with amazing friends, and having an online-based business. I’m fantastically in love with my little girl and I love doing things to prepare for her arrival. I love these things.

Should I feel guilty that I’m not: training for a marathon, writing the next great novel, learning Chinese and travelling constantly? Absolutely not! It’s so easy to lovingly eliminate what I don’t want. Not in a negative, harsh way, but in a beautiful acknowledgement of what I’m focused on and what I don’t need to worry about right now.

4. Outside messages have no power anymore.

You know those messages that come from TV, family, friends, the internet, our coworkers…every message that used to make me feel like I wasn’tenough: “You’re not doing X, you’re behind the times,” or “You’re not size 0, you need to work harder,” “you’re not as fast at X task as Susan, you might want to work on that.”

Now, it’s obvious to me that being a size 0 is not on my priority list, and that’s perfect. Learning Susan’s task isn’t one of my favorite things, I’m so grateful that Susan is so good at it. There are so many great things that others are doing, and that’s wonderful! I have that much more time for what I do want.

The more present I become and clearer I get with what I love, the more absurd those messages sound. It’s hilarious how often we’re led to believe we should do something just because ten other people believe it’s a desirable goal.

5. The things I love multiply and come into my life at lightening speed.

This is where that “magic” happens. As a result of not thinking about what I don’t want, not getting caught up in the messages of “should” and “shouldn’t,” not getting distracted by what isn’t happening now, I have incredible time and energy to do exactly what I love. I have the time to spend 30, 60, 90 minutes on writing my ebook that I previously would’ve spent chasing after something I “should” be doing. As a result? I’m about ready to release another ebook! I have more time to take walks, work on my business, and prepare for the new baby. Things happen so quickly in my life now that people tell me they can hardly keep up!

Go ahead and read the whole articles and more inspiring articles here

Read Full Post »

How to Create Habits That Stick

Today’s Inspiration: Liveboldandbloom.com

“Whether we realize it or not, our life is for such a large part made up from habits. That is why it is so powerful to change a habit. Many people think it is very hard but it doesn’t necessarily need to be hard. The important factor in creating a new habit is sticking with it! Yes, you will fall back into your old habits sometimes but this is not a reason to give up.”
~Sophie

Habit is a cable; we weave a thread each day, and at last we cannot break it.  ~Horace Mann

Whether or not you make New Year’s resolutions, the beginning of a new year is a psychological trigger for starting fresh. After all of the doodles, scribbles, and scratch-outs of 2011, the first day of 2012 is like a brand new shiny sheet of blank paper — and you’ve just been given a jumbo box of crayons.

So now what?

I’m sure you have a habit in mind that you’ve been attempting now for several years. Maybe it’s exercise, losing weight, eating better, learning something new, meditating, writing, or de-cluttering your house. You start the new year with a bang, but around February or March, you end with a whimper.

As much as you want to create that new habit and sustain it (and you really, really do), your desire to keep at it begins to fade away. At first it’s fun, then it’s challenging, then it’s work, and finally it’s forgotten.

Why does this happen?

It has nothing to do with your will power or energy. It has to do with brain chemistry. You haven’t given your brain enough time to fully rewire itself to incorporate your habit as part of your daily routine. And that’s what has to happen — you actually have to retrain your brain.

This may feel like a Catch-22. How can you give your brain enough time to rewire itself if you can’t sustain the motivation to give it time? It comes down to understanding exactly how habits are formed — and this is truly an art and a science! Most of us jump into a new habit full force. We decide we have to lose weight, so we immediately change our diet, start exercising, write down everything we eat, and begin weighing ourselves.

But each one of those changes is comprised of a series of many smaller habits. By deciding to lose weight, you are asking your brain to accommodate 10 or more new habits rather than just one. Your brain can’t handle that. It’s like asking a toddler to pass advanced chemistry. No wonder we give up. So how do we ever accomplish any goal or make any habit stick for longer than a few weeks? There is a very specific and well researched method for doing just that. Here are the steps:

Shift your perspective

Recognize that creating a new habit is like making money. It doesn’t happen overnight. You must view it as a process, with a few starts and stops, rather than something that is going to happen just because you’ve decided to make it happen. Creating a new habit is an endeavor with many moving parts that are sometimes out of your control, so go into it knowing that your journey may not be linear. It might zig and zag at times.

Plan before you begin

Before you launch right in to your new habit, take several days or a week to plan out your habit work. Prepare for the steps I outline below. Make sure you think through the changes and adjustments you and those close to you will need to make to accommodate this new habit work. Take time to write down your plan.

Start really small and simple.

This is the most essential step in creating a new habit. If you want to lose weight for example, you can’t begin with all of the habits I mentioned above. Pick one thing, like changing your diet. Then break that down into something even smaller, like adding more veggies to your diet. Then break that down into adding one more green vegetable at dinner.

This is especially important if you’ve been unsuccessful with adding habits to your life in the past. Starting with a really small habit will allow you to practice the method successfully before you tackle more difficult habits.

Create habits one at a time

Don’t try to tackle several new habits at once. Start with one habit and work on it until it becomes completely automatic before you begin working on another habit. This could take 6-weeks to 3 months depending on the difficulty of the habit. Dividing your focus with several habits will undermine the likelihood of success with any of them.

Have a trigger

In the context of creating a new habit, a trigger is something to remind you to do your habit. Your new habit should immediately follow your trigger. A trigger should be a well-established, long-standing habit that you do regularly, like brushing your teeth or starting the coffee. Attaching your new habit to one that is already established helps reinforce the new habit in your brain chemistry.

Make it really easy

When you first begin a new habit, if it is something that takes time like meditating or walking, begin with doing your habit for 5 minutes only. This sounds too easy, but believe me, this 5-minute rule is really important. In the first week or two of your new habit, you are establishing a new routine and fitting this new action into your life.

Sticking to 5 minutes, even if you feel you could go longer, makes it so easy you won’t feel resistant to doing it. Once you feel the habit is becoming automatic, then slowly increase your time.

Create public accountability

Many of us don’t tell others when we begin a new habit because we don’t want to be embarrassed if we fail. But public accountability can be a great motivator. Announce your new habit on Facebook or other social media, or email all of your friends to let them know. Then create a daily system of reporting your progress to these people.

Have a support system

In addition to having accountability, you need positive support and encouragement to keep you motivated and engaged in the work of your habit — especially when you start to get bored or tired of the work. You can set this up with friends and family. And there are many great support forums online where you can meet other people working on the same habit.

Reward yourself

Give yourself a small reward after your daily habit work. This could be anything from a piece of chocolate to allowing yourself 5 minutes to surf the net. Whatever feels like a reward for you — give that to yourself after your habit. If it starts to feel rote, then change up the reward.

Expect setbacks

Setbacks are inevitable. You might get sick. You may have to travel or change locations. You may just blow it off on a particular day. Plan ahead for as many potential setbacks as you can and have a back-up plan. For the unexpected setbacks, just start again as soon as you can. Don’t use setbacks as an excuse to stop your work.

Read the whole article here

Read Full Post »

Are You Positive? How and Why Affirmations Work.

Today’s Inspiration: Thewellnesswarrior.com.au

“Until a few months ago I never really got into affirmations. However, after reading Louise Hay’s books  I started to understand the power of affirmations. I loved this article, written by Jessica, describes how affirmations work and why they are so powerful.”
~Sophie

“An affirmation opens the door. It’s a beginning point on the path to change.”
– Louise Hay

I talk to myself a lot. Most of the time I do it in my head, but some times I will do it out loud. The latter is usually only in the company of my dog. I’m not crazy. Not by clinical standards, anyway. I simply understand the power my words and thoughts have over my life. Constantly repeating positive affirmations has had a major effect on my life.

According to Dr Bruce Lipton, most of our beliefs are formed when we are children. Perhaps it was said that you are stupid, lazy, selfish, or shy. This affirmation would have left an imprint in your mind, during the years that are most formative. And then these unwholesome statements can stay with you in the conscious or unconscious mind, only to be reinforced throughout the rest of your life. Unless you do something about it. The core beliefs that we have in this moment are the results of our past experiences – things we heard, things we’ve seen, and things we were told. This doesn’t make them real though.

The unconscious mind cannot tell the difference between a real or imagined idea, so it responds to whatever suggestions you give it. So, if you’re constantly telling yourself that you are stupid, fat, lazy, or shy – that is the reality you are going to create for yourself.

The awesome and empowering part of this is that we can turn it all around. When we are aware of the mind’s powerful ability to create whatever it is we tell it to, we can go ahead and do just that.

By repeating positive affirmations you can actually retrain your mind to create a reality that matches your goals.

By changing your perception, you change your reality. It all starts with the thoughts you think. These thoughts become your feelings, these feelings become your vibration and your vibration ultimately becomes your life. It is your vibration that determines whether you are attracting what you want into your life or not. So, as simple as they are, affirmations can transform every aspect of our lives including our health, relationships and success.

How to make affirmations work

For affirmations to be effective they must be written in the first person, be in the present tense, be goal orientated and be written as though they have already been achieved. So don’t go around saying things like “I wish” or “I will” or “I want”. You need to act as if.

You affirmations must be followed through with some kind of supporting action. You need to walk your talk. There’s no point in affirming that you’re a Power Ranger if you’re not prepared to go out and hire a coloured suit and helmet.

Here are some of the affirmations I repeat every day:

• I have a perfectly healthy body and mind
• I am healing now
• I love and approve of myself
• Abundance flows into my life in surprising ways every day
• Life flows effortlessly
• All my relationships are harmonious

Add power to your positivity

Repeat your affirmations as often as possible. The more you repeat them, the deeper they will be ingrained into your mind, and the faster they will be implemented in your subconscious.

You can speak them out loud, repeat them to yourself, write them down over and over again in a journal and write them on post it notes and stick them all over your house. I have mine written on the mirror in my bathroom, inside my diary, on my computer screen saver, on my vision board, and I even set reminders on my phone throughout the day so I am randomly greeted with something telling me “You look beautiful today, Jessica!”

Want to dive deeper?

Read more at the super inspirational site by Jessica: thewellnesswarrior.com.au

Do you use positive affirmations? How have they helped you? What are some of your favorites?

Read Full Post »

Cheerfulness is the Best Promoter of Health

Read Full Post »